#SoCS: Rolling with life’s ups and downs

This post is part of the Stream of Consciousness Saturday blog hop. Linda Hill posts a prompt every Friday; today’s prompt is “up/down.” 

I’ve been thinking about life’s ups and downs a lot lately, maybe because the last couple of years have been up-and-downy for me, even more than normal. Of course there’s the Microbe that Must not be Named, but even setting that aside, I feel like my mood and energy as well as life events have fluctuated quite a lot. I’ve always prided myself on being resilient, on being able to roll with life’s punches, but lately I’ve been feeling life’s bumps a little more.

It’s been an eventful time, moving and settling into a new city and a new job during a pandemic. Hubs has been recovering from major surgery (poor guy had to deal with move prep as soon as he got home from the hospital and moving just a couple months post-op), and I’ve had some weird health issues in the last few weeks. Maybe it’s the pandemic, maybe it’s the health issues, or maybe it’s the fact that we’re now in our mid-50s, but it seems like we’re both more aware of our own mortality now, of the fact that we’re on the downhill side of middle age and gathering speed with each passing day.

Then there’s my writing life. At the risk of sounding like a temperamental artist, my creative life is one big rollercoaster. Some days it’s amazing: the words and ideas come easily, scenes fall into place, and I think I can actually do this writing thing. Other days I sit at my computer and fight for every syllable, or I get a form rejection, and I feel like I’m deluding myself about this writing thing. And some days I roll my eyes at what a drama queen I am about my writing. *sigh*

But there are good things. There are always good things. They are often small and mundane, but as I grow older, I have a deeper appreciation for the small, good things: a cactus flower spotted on a morning walk, the desert spiny lizard that’s taken up residence on our front porch, a good meal or a good book or a good rest. It’s a cliché, yes, but life is made up of those small things much more than it is the big things. And as I become more and more aware that I have less and less time left on this planet, I want to savor everything, big or small, up or down.