No, I don’t want to live in a fictional world
I’m so excited to be co-hosting the IWSG monthly blog hop, along with my wonderful co-hosts, J Lenni Dorner, PJ Colando, Jenni Enzor, and Diane Burton! Please stop by their blogs and show them some comment love. Also, this is my 30th IWSG post. How the heck did that happen? (If you’re really bored, you can go here to read the first 29). In this month’s post, I’ll answer the optional question, If you could live in any book world, which one would you choose? But first, a couple of things.
I have a newsletter!
After spending several quality hours with MailerLite, I have a newsletter! If you’d like to see my nonsense witty commentary in your inbox, type your email in the signup box at the top of the righthand sidebar. I’d love to have you join me on my writing adventures, and I’ll even bribe you with a free story.
This blog’s setting and dramatis personae
Co-hosting often brings a lot of new visitors to the blog, so the first time I co-hosted, I started my post with a quick introduction to this blog and the wackiness it contains. If you’re new here and would like to be forewarned better understand the insane world you’ve just entered, give it a read. This time I’ll kick off my co-host post with a few recurring characters and concepts that show up around here. To wit:
- Camp WTF: My home, my world, my life. The name pretty much covers it. I gave up a long time ago on the idea that life should make sense. Now I roll with whatever comes my way, usually by wandering around my house looking bewildered and muttering, “WTF.”
- Long-Suffering Husband: This poor man has put up with me for 36 years. He deserves a medal–or some good meds. You can see him in his happy place in this post.
- My muse (the drunken floozy): She may or may not show up for my morning writing sessions (lately not). When she does decide to make an appearance, she staggers in with a half-empty bottle of tequila in one hand, a cigarette in the other, and patches of puke in her straggly hair. Instead of being helpful, she flops on my office floor, takes a few pulls from the bottle, and demands to know why I can’t think of any good ideas on my own. She first showed up on the blog a couple of years ago.
- The Demon of Suckitude: Unlike my muse, he shows up regularly, perching on my shoulder, sinking his claws into my trapezius, and whispering adverbs in my ear. Until this post, he’s only appeared on this blog once.
- Editor-Stripe: My inner editor, who has the appearance and temperament of Stripe from Gremlins. He’s also only appeared on this blog once, co-starring with the Demon of Suckitude. He likes to show up when I’m drafting and whittle away my soul with nitpicking.
Living in fictional worlds
Now let’s get to this month’s optional question: If you could live in any book world, which one would you choose? I’m gonna go with one of those fun travel memoirs where the author visits beautiful places I can’t afford, eats a lot of amazing food without ever gaining a pound, and somehow also finds time to figure out her purpose in life.
Oh, wait, you meant a fictional world. I’ve tried imagining myself in my favorite fictional worlds, but my cold-eyed realism always spoils the fun.
- Harry Potter (or any other world with magic): Read the news. See what humans do to each other? Do you seriously want to give us supernatural powers?
- Hunger Games: I’d have an arrow through my gut before I ever stepped off the plate. And don’t get me started on an authoritarian society that dominates and exploits those it considers disposable. I try to stay away from politics on here.
- Outlander: As much as I like looking at men in kilts, I have zero interest in visiting a time in which there’s no electricity, no internet, no modern medicine, and no rights for women. Also: time travel is way cool (I’ve even written a couple of time travel stories), but if it were to ever actually exist, we humans would have so many new ways to screw up our own and other people’s lives. I posted about the pros and cons of time travel back in 2020. I stand by every word.
Bonus–not primarily book worlds (though there are books in both):
- Star Wars: I’ll admit, I’m tempted. Light sabers! Faster-than-light travel! (when the !@#$% hyperdrive works) Handsome, roguish space smugglers! But again, do we really want to give humans more power than we already have? That definitely didn’t work out so well for the Alderaanians (Alderaaanites? Alderaaanlings? Whatever. They’re dead, because Lucas thought it would be a good idea to give humans a planet-killing death ray.)
- Star Trek (mostly TOS and TNG , because I mostly quit paying attention after those): I’m even more tempted, because the Star Trek universe is a lot less Wild West than Star Wars, and the Federation is downright civilized. And getting to hang out in space with Leonard Nimoy and George Takai… OK, sign me up–as long as you don’t make me wear one of those TOS miniskirt things. Sorry, Shatner, I’m too old for that nonsense, and so are you.
Seriously, the only fictional world I want to live in is the one where I get enough sleep every night, I can retire early, and my muse (the drunken floozy) shows up every morning to do her damn job.
Bonus: Writing Memes!
English is weird
Punctuation is important
Characteristics of writers
And that’s why I don’t write in public.
I do, in fact, have exactly 3 of these characteristics.
Speaking of notebooks:
The writing life
And I’d have gotten away with it too, if it hadn’t been for… me.
And my second drafts and sometimes my third drafts and parts of my eighth drafts and…
And then when the garbage is finally published:
Character wrangling
Apparently this person has never heard of, “conflict.”
And finally:
Time for me to get back to writing up incident reports. Happy IWSG Day! Which fictional world would you like to live in?
62 Comments
jlennidorner
Let’s see… I have at least 20 IWSG posts on my current blog. And at least 13 on my former blog. So we’re at about the same number of posts for this group. Cool!
Hunger Games… I’m not sure we don’t live in the world, or aren’t headed there.
You mentioned Star Wars and Star Trek. I mentioned another “star” series.
For the IWSG July prompt asking which book world I would live in, I narrowed it down to three choices.
One is a short-story I published. One is from a popular series. And one is better known from television, but there are books. It’s all on my blog.
Today’s Google Doodle g.co/doodle/5m9rrry This is a tribute to Charlie Hill of the Oneida Nation, the first Native American stand-up comedian to be on a nationally broadcast television show.
Over at Operation Awesome, our Pass or Pages query contest is open this week with July’s family saga genre. Know any writers who might want to enter?
J Lenni Dorner (he/him ?? or ?? they/them) ~ Co-host of the #AtoZchallenge, OperationAwesome6 Debut Author Interviewer, Reference& Speculative Fiction Author
Janet Alcorn
I hear you about being headed for the Hunger Games world. My son says he’s tired of living through an entire unit of history class. I’m tired of living in a dystopian novel.
I didn’t know about Charlie Hill, though I’m sure I’ve seen him in a few things.
I don’t know anyone writing a family saga, but if I hear of anyone I’ll send them your way.
Happy IWSG Day!
Alex J. Cavanaugh
Those were funny!
There are a lot of fictional worlds that would be cool but so dangerous. Star Trek would be fun though.
Thanks for co-hosting today.
Janet Alcorn
Cool but dangerous–exactly. And the older I get, the less willing I am to trade safety for coolness. Thanks for stopping by!
Lynn La Vita
Great sense of humor! Thanks for co-hosting this month!
Janet Alcorn
Thanks! Always happy to bring the comic relief.
Liza
Thank you for some good chuckles here and thank you for co-hosting IWSG this month!
Janet Alcorn
Thanks for stopping by!
Patricia Anne Pierce-garcia Schaack
Hi,
I like your muse, drunken Floozy. She sounds like quite a muse.
Thank you for co-hosting.
Shalom aleichem,
Pat G @ EverythingMustChange
Janet Alcorn
Ha! She’s a character 🙂 Thanks for stopping by!
J.S. Pailly
The Star Trek universe is pretty much the only fictional universe I really want to live in. I don’t think I’d join Starfleet, though. I’d much rather hang out with Jake Sisko and do lots of writing.
Janet Alcorn
That sounds like a lovely plan! Or maybe be writer in residence on whatever the Star Trek equivalent of a cruise ship is 🙂
melissamaygrove
Those are some funny memes. I have the ironic hyphen thing on a t-shirt.
Thanks for co-hosting.
Janet Alcorn
Oh, I didn’t know that was available on a t-shirt. I might have to get one of those! Thanks for stopping by!
Rhonda Gilmour writing romance as Sadira Stone
Love all the writing memes! I’d love a stay in the Star Trek universe, even if I had to wear a mini-dress. Thanks for co-hosting.
Janet Alcorn
Glad you liked the memes! I’d have rocked a Star Trek mini-dress 30 years ago, but now… eh. I’d probably tolerate it for a chance to experience that world though 🙂
cleemckenzie
You’ve quite logically dismissed many fascinating fictional worlds as potential habitats. Good points all! And thanks for doing a great job of co-hosting this month.
Janet Alcorn
Yeah, I’m no fun at all. I really ticked off an old-school Southerner once. She was waxing poetic about how wonderful it would be to live in the antebellum south (of course she was white), and I pointed out that she most likely would have died from an infection or childbirth already. Probably not one of my more diplomatic moves 🙂
Jacqui Murray
I like that you picked your own fictional world (as did I). Star Trek is appealing, but I don’t like being at the whim of machinery that could break.
Janet Alcorn
That’s a good point about the machinery, especially if it’s necessary for survival. I mean, I can barely function without the internet 🙂
Mary Aalgaard
Funny post. And, you’re spot on about humans and what disasters they’d create with magic and/or time travel. It’s fun to fantasize. When I was a kid, I wanted to live on the Enterprise with Kirk, Spock, Sulu and the gang!
Janet Alcorn
When I was a kid, I wanted to live in Oz and Narnia and every fairy tale world and… yeah. But if I had to go a day without TV, I became insufferable, so apparently I hadn’t yet been visited by the Logic Fairy 🙂
Jenni
LOL! I loved these memes! I’m with you on those travel memoirs. If only nonfiction had been part of the prompt.
I also liked the points you made about fictional worlds as well…they’re not all they’re cracked up to be.
What a fun post!
Janet Alcorn
Thanks–glad you liked it! The thing is, fiction has to include conflict, and setting is often a source of it, so yeah, fictional worlds are usually not great. A couple of other posters made good cases for the Shire, though. Wish I’d thought of that. Is it time for Second Breakfast yet?
joylene
Your imagination is … I’m trying to find the right word … exceptional, but that doesn’t really do it justice. Love your newsletter and your posts and your content. That covers it all, I hope.
Janet Alcorn
Thank you so much! I’m glad someone enjoys my twisted view of the world 🙂
charitybradford
Haha! I almost put down the Star Trek Universe. Why? For all the same reasons you listed. I grew up on TOS reruns and TNG. I believe that has greatly influenced my own writing.
Janet Alcorn
I’m in the TOS rerun generation too–and the movies of course. I don’t write sci-fi (except for the occasional postapocalyptic piece), so I don’t think Star Trek influenced my writing, but it definitely set me up for disappointment. Where’s the interstellar travel, time travel, teleportation, and cool Dr. McCoy medical device that fixes you without invasive procedures?
Sonia Dogra
Hi! I quite enjoyed this post. It was fun. You’ve got an engaging style. My initial thoughts too were about the Potter world. But then something else caught my fancy. Thanks for co-hosting.
Janet Alcorn
Thanks! I’ll check out your post–I’m curious which world bumped out Potter.
Arlee Bird
I’m with you on living in fictional worlds. They’re interesting to read about perhaps, but rarely intriguing enough for me to want to live in them. That’s why I read! Read one and then move on to another while in the comforts of wherever I actually am.
Some funny quotes there.
Arlee Bird
Tossing It Out
Janet Alcorn
“Read one and then move on to another while in the comforts of wherever I actually am”–exactly! Good story + armchair travel for the win!
Loni Townsend
That same sensibility hit me too. Way too dangerous out in the fictional worlds. I loved all your pictures. They had me nodding and snorting along the way.
Janet Alcorn
Yeah, sometimes I miss being a kid and having my head in all sorts of fantasy worlds with no regard for the (lack of) safety and comfort. I’m too dang practical now.
Glad you had a good laugh!
chemistken
I’m intrigued that you’re using Mailerlite. I’m thinking of trying that out in preparation for my newsletter.
Thanks for co-hosting IWSG today!
Janet Alcorn
MailerLite was pretty easy to set up, and the free version offers all the features I need and is good for up to 1000 subscribers, I think. It has an iOS app too, though I haven’t done much with it yet.
mlouisebarbourfundyblue
Thanks for co-hosting today, Janet! Your post was hilarious, and I certainly need to laugh! I’m very happy to be living now, thank you, although I am quite entranced with Jamie in Outlander. I, too, have a long-suffering husband. He doesn’t get my fascination with writing and blogging, but he backs me all the way. I hoe you have lots of fun today!
Janet Alcorn
Ah, yes, Jamie Fraser. One of my favorite male literary characters. I love how he’s both flawed and heroic in such interesting ways (as is Claire and, really, all the other major characters in Outlander).
My Long-Suffering Husband backs me all the way too. It’s wonderful, and I’m truly lucky.
Susan M. Gourley
Thanks for all the smiles. Yes, Star Trek, the peaceful parts, would be great.
Janet Alcorn
Happy to oblige! I think a lot of us could use a good laugh.
Adrienne Reiter
Great memes. Much needed laugh during these dark times. I’m trying to imagine a fictional world less scary than our own. One where we’re not controlled by robots, plague or hypnotic algorithms. (I also have strong opinions on the Oxford comma. lol) I’m with Alex. StarTrek it is! Thank you for co-hosting.
Janet Alcorn
Dark times indeed. Every laugh helps. Thanks for stopping by!
Olga Godim
Lovely memes. I feel like that rat in the garbage bin about my own writing too.
Janet Alcorn
Same. I need constructive feedback, but…
Sandra Cox (@Sandra_Cox)
Ha. Ha. Ha. I love the fictional world you want to live in.
What a fun post.
Janet Alcorn
Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it!
Barbara
I needed a great laugh today and you gave it to me with this post. I love your explanations of your personae and then the memes–well several were laugh-out-loud funny. Great job.
Janet Alcorn
Thanks! I figure most of us can use a good laugh.
Lynda R Young as Elle Cardy
Thanks for the chuckle. Think how boring books would be if they were set in the perfect world to live in.
Janet Alcorn
Yes, exactly. Settings are supposed to add conflict.
Miffie Seideman
Always a great laugh. I love your wit and sarcasm. I would second Star Trek, but only if I could also have Spock’s mind meld powers.
Janet Alcorn
Thanks! Sarcasm is one of my superpowers 🙂 I want McCoy’s device that fixes whatever’s wrong with someone. No more surgery. No more dental work. Sign me up.
Damyanti Biswas
Glad to see you’ve picked the universe you created too 😀 I see a lot of adrenaline pumping in the alternate worlds you’ve chosen. It would be really intriguing to live in a world like that!
Janet Alcorn
I’m old. If I want adrenaline, I’ll ride a roller coaster or read a book. I want the world I live in to be nice and boring 🙂
Jemima Pett
Thanks so much for hosting today.
I think you may have overstated the wackiness warning to readers, though. You seem perfectly normal to me.
But then, I only own up to one of those things authors are supposed to have.
Janet Alcorn
If I seem normal to you, that’s… concerning 🙂 But then we writers aren’t exactly a normal bunch.
Tyrean Martinson
Yes, a fictional world where I get enough sleep. That would be nice.
And yes to Star Trek being far less wild west, but no on the minis.
Happy writing!
Janet Alcorn
Happy writing to you too! Thanks for stopping by.
Lee Lowery
I am not adverse to a little danger and/or excitement in my fictional world. Dragons, magic, space travel. I’m up for an adventure.
Love love love the memes. I relate to every single one. And for the record, I’m firmly in the Team Oxford camp.
Janet Alcorn
Glad you enjoyed the memes! And yes, Team Oxford Comma all the way!
Elizabeth Seckman
As a resident and occasional gardener at Camp WTF, I’m glad to have you as my neighbor. You always make me laugh, which I love.
Janet Alcorn
Howdy, neighbor! Sorry for my messy yard. I’ll get back to gardening when the temperature drops below 95 (so late September probably).